“If You Can’t Grow a Pair, Buy a Pair.”

Let’s talk about courage.

Not the heroic, run-into-a-burning-building kind.
I mean the everyday leadership courage — the “I need to talk to Bob about his email tone” kind.

Because honestly, most business owners are not struggling with strategy.
They’re struggling with conversations and decisions they’re avoiding.

Tell me if any of these sound familiar:

• You know a team member is just not cutting it, but you keep “giving it time.”
• You’re undercharging a client who eats up 78% of your emotional bandwidth.
• Your calendar looks like a buffet and you’re the main course.
• You nod in meetings while your inner voice whispers, “This is not okay,” but your outer face says, “Of course, no problem at all!”

We’ve all been there.
We could win Oscars for “Performance in a Business Setting While Silently Screaming Inside.”

And that’s the moment the old saying shows up:
“Grow a pair.”

Except sometimes… you just can’t.
You’re tired. You’re overwhelmed. You are one conflict away from hiding under the desk with a muffin.

So I propose a new leadership motto:

If you can’t grow a pair, buy a pair.

To be clear: No shopping carts, no Etsy searches, no farm-to-table options.

“Buying a pair” means borrowing courage.

Courage is not a personality trait. 

It’s not something you either have or don’t have.
It’s a skill — like driving a stick shift or not replying to emails at 11PM.

If you don’t have courage yet, you can rent it from structure, clarity, and accountability.

Examples:

1. Borrow Courage From Structure
   The S.O.P. or the disciplinary code or the industry best practice, the job description or the “Payroll Band”
2. Borrow Courage From a Decision Made Ahead of Time.
   When you already know your non-negotiables, the conversation becomes informing, not negotiating.
3. Borrow Courage From Your People — your coach, your peer circle, your ‘board of advisors’ who will lovingly ask:

“So did you actually have the conversation, or are you still emotionally knitting a blanket of excuses?”
or “ How much longer will you let the business /others suffer the impact?”

“How much more emotional energy are you prepared to sacrifice with this indecision?”

We all need those people.

Because left alone with our thoughts, we will:

• Rewrite the conversation 47 times
• Convince ourselves it’s “not that bad”
• Schedule the talk for “next week”
• Repeat until retirement

Meanwhile, the problem spreads, morale sinks, and your brain becomes a full-time conflict zone. Exhaustion makes the next decision even harder!

Avoidance is expensive.

The moment we finally take action, we almost always say:

“Why did I wait so long? That wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought.”

Because courage isn’t about being fearless.

It’s about being willing to be a little bit uncomfortable for a much better outcome.

So here’s your December invitation — wrapped with a bow and a gentle push:

Think of one conversation, boundary, or decision you’ve been avoiding.

Name it.
Don’t let it float around like glitter in the air — sparkly but unhelpful.

Now ask yourself:

• What structure, prep, or support would make this 20% easier?

Because you don’t need to be braver tomorrow. You just need to be clear and prepared enough today.

If you can’t grow a pair, buy a pair.
Borrow courage until it becomes part of who you are.

And soon enough —
You won’t need to borrow anymore.

Your leadership voice will feel like home.